Antares Administration
SOC-12
This week's winner of the coveted "Six Eyes" Award in Advertising!
Paul Nemeth
AA
The Gateway's Best Commercials/Jingles
- Thread starter Antares Administration
- Start date
Paul Nemeth
AA
SCENE: Back alley at night, point of view (POV) is static shot from 3 meters above the ground and against one wall. Refuse containers and various forms of junk line either side of the alley and mysterious vapors float about.
A figure enters the picture at the far, dark end of the alley, running toward the camera's end of the alley. As the figure gets closer, we see it is a woman (the Runner), built like a long distance runner and attired in what is thought of as garb typical of travellers (military surplus/durable work clothes). She runs out of frame below POV.
[CUT]
POV is the entrance to the alley at ground level, looking out toward a street. The woman comes to a stop, back to the wall, clearly in a position to recon the street. She whips her head around to see what's behind her.
[CUT]
Travelling shot down the alley, the opposite wall from the POV blurred. The Young Guy enters the frame to the left, running slightly faster than the camera's POV is moving. He too is attired in traveller chic and is carrying a bulky burnished silver briefcase in one hand. He runs out of frame to the right.
[CUT]
POV is ground level; stout human (Big Guy) stands to one side looking back as a Vargr enters the alley running. No surprise both appear to be travellers.
[CUT]
Young Guy running directly towards the camera. His foot catches something unseen, he trips and he begins to fall face first toward the pavement, arms thrown out before him.
[CUT]
Young Guy again, but POV is to one side as he crashes to the pavement in slow motion . . .
[CUT]
Young Guy, still in slow motion hitting pavement, bouncing hard, briefcase flying from his hand. . .
[CUT]
Look of shock on the Runner's face before she breaks into a run back down the alley.
[CUT]
POV is low shot looking up at Big Guy and Vargr as they come to a halt in slow motion.
[CUT]
Young Guy's head comes off the pavement, the pain evident on his face, as he looks past the camera at. . .
[CUT]
the briefcase sitting on the ground, it's lid open. Most of the interior is taken up by a spongy packing material in the middle of which sits a cube, about 1cm on a side, wrapped in a clear plastic like substance. The cube looks like it's made from tofu with swirls of lime jell-o shot through it. The Runner's feet enter the picture; she bends down to close the case. . .
[CUT]
Young Guy has been helped to his feet by Big Guy who asks, "Can you make it?" a look of obvious concern on his face. . .
[CUT]
In close up, the Runner, holding the case now, appears similarly concerned . . .
[CUT]
Close up of the Vargr's head, tongue lolling out of the corner of his mouth. He holds the pose for a bare moment before cocking his head to one side. . .
[CUT]
Young Guy looks at all of them, pain now gone, a new determination lights his face. His expression says that to him, not only will they succeed in their endeavor, but that it's a foregone conclusion. Big Guy, with a proud father to son look on his face, nods once at Young Guy.
[CUT]
POV is again from 3 meters above the ground, looking down the center of the alley. The Runner sprints in from the bottom of the screen headed for the end of the alley in the distance. She is quickly followed by Big Guy, Young Guy (moving a bit slower) and then the Vargr
[CUT]
Black screen with large block capitals in white across it, the product tag line. A deep and comforting voice reads: "BEHOLD, THE POWER OF SPLOGE" while the logo of the Imperial Sploge Marketing Counsel appears in the lower right hand corner of the screen.
[FADE OUT]
A figure enters the picture at the far, dark end of the alley, running toward the camera's end of the alley. As the figure gets closer, we see it is a woman (the Runner), built like a long distance runner and attired in what is thought of as garb typical of travellers (military surplus/durable work clothes). She runs out of frame below POV.
[CUT]
POV is the entrance to the alley at ground level, looking out toward a street. The woman comes to a stop, back to the wall, clearly in a position to recon the street. She whips her head around to see what's behind her.
[CUT]
Travelling shot down the alley, the opposite wall from the POV blurred. The Young Guy enters the frame to the left, running slightly faster than the camera's POV is moving. He too is attired in traveller chic and is carrying a bulky burnished silver briefcase in one hand. He runs out of frame to the right.
[CUT]
POV is ground level; stout human (Big Guy) stands to one side looking back as a Vargr enters the alley running. No surprise both appear to be travellers.
[CUT]
Young Guy running directly towards the camera. His foot catches something unseen, he trips and he begins to fall face first toward the pavement, arms thrown out before him.
[CUT]
Young Guy again, but POV is to one side as he crashes to the pavement in slow motion . . .
[CUT]
Young Guy, still in slow motion hitting pavement, bouncing hard, briefcase flying from his hand. . .
[CUT]
Look of shock on the Runner's face before she breaks into a run back down the alley.
[CUT]
POV is low shot looking up at Big Guy and Vargr as they come to a halt in slow motion.
[CUT]
Young Guy's head comes off the pavement, the pain evident on his face, as he looks past the camera at. . .
[CUT]
the briefcase sitting on the ground, it's lid open. Most of the interior is taken up by a spongy packing material in the middle of which sits a cube, about 1cm on a side, wrapped in a clear plastic like substance. The cube looks like it's made from tofu with swirls of lime jell-o shot through it. The Runner's feet enter the picture; she bends down to close the case. . .
[CUT]
Young Guy has been helped to his feet by Big Guy who asks, "Can you make it?" a look of obvious concern on his face. . .
[CUT]
In close up, the Runner, holding the case now, appears similarly concerned . . .
[CUT]
Close up of the Vargr's head, tongue lolling out of the corner of his mouth. He holds the pose for a bare moment before cocking his head to one side. . .
[CUT]
Young Guy looks at all of them, pain now gone, a new determination lights his face. His expression says that to him, not only will they succeed in their endeavor, but that it's a foregone conclusion. Big Guy, with a proud father to son look on his face, nods once at Young Guy.
[CUT]
POV is again from 3 meters above the ground, looking down the center of the alley. The Runner sprints in from the bottom of the screen headed for the end of the alley in the distance. She is quickly followed by Big Guy, Young Guy (moving a bit slower) and then the Vargr
[CUT]
Black screen with large block capitals in white across it, the product tag line. A deep and comforting voice reads: "BEHOLD, THE POWER OF SPLOGE" while the logo of the Imperial Sploge Marketing Counsel appears in the lower right hand corner of the screen.
[FADE OUT]
Shadowdancer
SOC-14 1K
Excellent! I don't know what it is, but I want to buy some. Now.
Antares Administration
SOC-12
Or as Homer would say, "OOOOOOHHH, Sploge...."
Paul Nemeth
AA
Paul Nemeth
AA
bromdenlong
SOC-12
[There's also: Man in a spacesuit, adrift in deep space, slowly floating past the camera. "Can you hear me now? Good!"
* twitch...shudder...twitch, twitch *
* twitch...shudder...twitch, twitch *
Cut to shot of human couple sleeping in bed. Close in on glass of water on the nightstand next to the woman.
Cut to a tracking shot of a small cruise missle travelling NOE. The cruise missle passes over a small black obelisk. The obelisk takes focus and two green lights appear on it.
Cut back to long shot of the house as the missle pops up over a distant hill.
Close in on the missle as it suddenly explodes in mid air.
Cut to shot of turf-covered doors quietly closing over a retracting VRF Gauss gun.
Close in on the glass of water as small ripples appear. Cut to medium shot of the woman as she sighs in her sleep and turns over to snuggle close to her partner.
Instellarms Logo fades in:
"The new PDX86 Home Point Defence System. You can sleep--because we never do!"
Antares Administration
SOC-12
Now picture the cruise missle MIRV'ing as it comes over the horizon.
(actually, I guess the correct term would be MIMV'ing (multiple independant manoeuvre vehicle)).
Paul Nemeth
AA
Mr. Nemeth,Originally posted by Antares Administration:
Now picture the cruise missle MIRV'ing as it comes over the horizon.
(actually, I guess the correct term would be MIMV'ing (multiple independant manoeuvre vehicle)).
Paul Nemeth
AA
Thank you for your query regarding the PDX86 system and its performance against multiple inbound targets. We are confident that the PDX86's 0.026 second acquisition time at 200 kilometers, and the ability to engage up to 16 independant targets within 3 seconds of acquisition is more than adequate for the most demanding home user. When combined with the add-on anti-personnel package, this is a truly effective home security system as our more than 18,000 satisfied customers will attest. Our partnering agreement with the Better Home Bunker Designs of Borderline Security Services allows us to offer you additional peace of mind, should the occasional munition defeat the PDX86, or if your attacker elects to use energy weapons instead.
If you are concerned that a determined attacker may attempt to overwhelm point defense systems with several simultaneous MIMVs, you may wish to investigate our IDX1000 Installation Point Defense Series, which includes additional VRF Gauss capacity, nuclear and meson damping, a Model 4/fib tracking engine, redundant power supplies and optional orbital lasing and kinetic kill capabilities. The system has been functioning for over 3 years now at large facilities owned by Ling Standard Products, Hortalez et Cie and the Imperial Marines, among clients of note.
Hopefully, the attached holo-brochures for both the PDX86 and the IDX1000 systems will answer any other questions you might have. I would be delighted, however, to discuss this with you in person so please do not hesitate to call.
Sincerely,
Eneri Shushigilli,
Subsector Manager of Sales
Instellarms
Liam Devlin
SOC-14 5K
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
TO: paraquat Johnson
FROM: Liam Devlin
Re:--ROFLMAO!
Liam Devlin
SOC-14 5K
TO: RoyGbiv
From: Liam devlin
Re: PDX86 & PDX1000...
[decrypted from Meson transmitter X-ray Alpha November]
request installation of said devices at Lonestar cafe/ and personal domicile residences (7) in Spinward marches locales.
credit chip serial access code follows [scrambled]...
END TRANSMISSION..
5 stars!
From: Liam devlin
Re: PDX86 & PDX1000...
[decrypted from Meson transmitter X-ray Alpha November]
request installation of said devices at Lonestar cafe/ and personal domicile residences (7) in Spinward marches locales.
credit chip serial access code follows [scrambled]...
END TRANSMISSION..
5 stars!
Scene: a desolate wilderness, a person is weaving reeds together into a screen. Reaching into a pack, an aerosol can is pulled out and sprayed onto the reeds...
Scene: A cargo hold, air is blasting out of a large hull breach. While two people manhandle the side panel of a collapsible cargo container over the hole, a third one pulls out a large aerosol can and begins spraying it over the now partly covered hole...
Scene: camoflauged people (are they hunters or soldiers? You can't see any insignia...) are gathered around a Jeep-type vehicle. While one holds branches against the body, a second sprays short bursts from an aerosol can onto them, sticking them into place...
Scene: As gunfire rages in the background, a pair of figures are using something from spray cans to construct a hasty barricade from overturned mess-tables and folding chairs...
Voice over: "Whether you need shelter." Cut back to scene 1, which zooms into the upper right corner.
VO: "A quick fix-it-up." Cut to scene 2, which zooms into the lower left corner.
VO: "Something hidden." Cut to scene 3, which zooms into the upper left corner.
VO: "Or just a few seconds of additional safety." Cut to scene 4, which zooms into the lower right corner. All four scenes are now playing themselves out in split screen.
VO: "All you really need, is Spray-Crete brand of instant-setting ablative foam!"
Can of product overlayed in center of screen.
"Available at Mercenary Warehouse..."
Wipe screen to vac-suited person sitting atop a hemisphere of foam, just beginning to become obscured by the incandescent plasma of re-entry.
"...and Extreme Sports Emporium locations throughout Imperial Space!"
Scene: A cargo hold, air is blasting out of a large hull breach. While two people manhandle the side panel of a collapsible cargo container over the hole, a third one pulls out a large aerosol can and begins spraying it over the now partly covered hole...
Scene: camoflauged people (are they hunters or soldiers? You can't see any insignia...) are gathered around a Jeep-type vehicle. While one holds branches against the body, a second sprays short bursts from an aerosol can onto them, sticking them into place...
Scene: As gunfire rages in the background, a pair of figures are using something from spray cans to construct a hasty barricade from overturned mess-tables and folding chairs...
Voice over: "Whether you need shelter." Cut back to scene 1, which zooms into the upper right corner.
VO: "A quick fix-it-up." Cut to scene 2, which zooms into the lower left corner.
VO: "Something hidden." Cut to scene 3, which zooms into the upper left corner.
VO: "Or just a few seconds of additional safety." Cut to scene 4, which zooms into the lower right corner. All four scenes are now playing themselves out in split screen.
VO: "All you really need, is Spray-Crete brand of instant-setting ablative foam!"
Can of product overlayed in center of screen.
"Available at Mercenary Warehouse..."
Wipe screen to vac-suited person sitting atop a hemisphere of foam, just beginning to become obscured by the incandescent plasma of re-entry.
"...and Extreme Sports Emporium locations throughout Imperial Space!"
Scene opens with a suit of empty battledress standing on a stage against a neutral backdrop. A figure enters from the left, wearing the uniform of an Imperial Marine drill sergeant (or drill instructor (DI)) (you and I would recognize him as Tommy Lee Jones). He stops next to the suit and pauses a moment before pointing at it, DI style and intoning:
"This is the last suit you'll ever wear".
Words flash on across the bottom of the screen as the DI exist to the left.
IMPERIAL MARINES
"A Proud Tradition"
and I can't help it but here's a follow-on commercial ;
Scene opens with a suit of empty battledress standing on a stage against a neutral backdrop. A figure enters from the left, wearing the uniform of an Imperial Marine drill sergeant (or drill instructor (DI)) (Will Smith this time). He stops next to the suit and pauses a moment before pointing at it, DI style and intoning:
"This is the last suit you'll ever wear. Again".
Words flash on across the bottom of the screen as the DI exist to the left.
IMPERIAL MARINE RESERVES
"Another Proud Tradition"
"This is the last suit you'll ever wear".
Words flash on across the bottom of the screen as the DI exist to the left.
IMPERIAL MARINES
"A Proud Tradition"
and I can't help it but here's a follow-on commercial ;
Scene opens with a suit of empty battledress standing on a stage against a neutral backdrop. A figure enters from the left, wearing the uniform of an Imperial Marine drill sergeant (or drill instructor (DI)) (Will Smith this time). He stops next to the suit and pauses a moment before pointing at it, DI style and intoning:
"This is the last suit you'll ever wear. Again".
Words flash on across the bottom of the screen as the DI exist to the left.
IMPERIAL MARINE RESERVES
"Another Proud Tradition"
Antares Administration
SOC-12
Nice one!
... and is there room in the commercial for a talking Pug, or maybe a bunch of small, java-swilling aliens who like breakdancing?
Paul Nemeth
AA
From the real-life M&Ms ad...
The girl wakes up in 2d b&w. She's surrounded by her friendly neighborhood Sparklies(tm, a popular holographic projector series).
"You were red, and you were blue, and you were green. Everything was in full holographic vision, and was all so beautiful. Oh, it was a LOT better!"
The girl wakes up in 2d b&w. She's surrounded by her friendly neighborhood Sparklies(tm, a popular holographic projector series).
"You were red, and you were blue, and you were green. Everything was in full holographic vision, and was all so beautiful. Oh, it was a LOT better!"
Commercial opens with homemade holovid of Vargr hanging out with his buddies.
Black screen with text: First in class at piracy school.
More homemade video of him hanging out with some pups.
Black screen with text: Rewards with kudos for boarding action against a merchant ship.
Images of him on his grav bike horsing around.
Black screen with text: That was all until he rammed his FSY Ludaccel-20 Grav bike into a Grav bridge at over 1000 km/h.
End Title :
Mothers Against Grav Cycle Carnage (MAGCC)
Stop the madness now.
Black screen with text: First in class at piracy school.
More homemade video of him hanging out with some pups.
Black screen with text: Rewards with kudos for boarding action against a merchant ship.
Images of him on his grav bike horsing around.
Black screen with text: That was all until he rammed his FSY Ludaccel-20 Grav bike into a Grav bridge at over 1000 km/h.
End Title :
Mothers Against Grav Cycle Carnage (MAGCC)
Stop the madness now.